Are you looking to spice things up in the bedroom this Valentine’s Day, but aren’t sure exactly what that looks like for you and your boo? Are you curious about the best positions, or the best places to get down and dirty on the internationally-recognized day of love? Well, look no further; The Exponent’s got the tips you need to keep it hot this V-day.
Disclaimer: Any sexual activity must always be done between two consensual adults who are ready and willing to be physical together, and must be done safely — we’re talking condoms AND birth control here, people.
Location, location, location:
One way to keep things spicy in the bedroom is to literally move your intimacy outside of it. Obviously, though, this makes it less private, and it’s important to consider your roommates if you move things around the home. Don’t be gross — people don’t want to watch New Girl on a couch they know you’ve had sex on. Keep it classy. However, if you live alone, go nuts. Literally.
One of the best places for this is your shower. The hot water helps keep things steamy, so you don’t need to worry about anything but protection to have enjoyable shower sex. The best place for this is in the back of the shower outside the direct stream of water (this can ruin the mood, especially if you’re lucky enough to have good water pressure at your place).
The kitchen also makes for an awesome location because of the immediate access to food. Pease, don’t do this if you have roommates, though — that’s rude. A fun way to get things heated up here is to cook together as a date — play some love songs and get into a flirty food-fight, and things will naturally get spicy. If one of you sits facing the other, or leans over the counter, while the other stands upright, both partners will definitely enjoy the unique positioning and option to snack afterwards.
Back to basics:
Maybe the idea of new positions and locations isn’t what you’re looking for, and you’re just wanting to enjoy some simple intimacy with your partner. Don’t think that cuddling and a good ol’ fashioned makeout sesh aren’t good enough for this? Sometimes, going back to the basics can reignite some intimacy that you might be missing during sex. The closeness forces both partners to be physically vulnerable while also displaying a mutual trust and security that the constant movement and even roughness of sex can’t always display. Instead of jumping right in to sex, or even getting into heavy foreplay, take some time to put on a movie and enjoy just being in each other’s arms, and makeout like high schoolers.
Kama Su-try this:
Maybe cuddling and making out are not what you’re looking for, and location isn’t an issue, either. Maybe you want to try something new with your partner for a special Valentine’s Day treat instead. With these positions, though, be sure to check-in with your partner and get consent throughout. There’s absolutely no shame in changing your mind at any point. Try these three different positions, and don’t be afraid to laugh it off if they don’t work the way you tried. Practice makes perfect, after all, but the practice part can be just as fun.
Interested in some soft kink, but never tried it? A fun intro to BDSM is to have your partner tie you up, with something soft like a shirt or bandana so you can break through easily. Once you’re both naked and laying on the bed, put both arms above your head and tie them together. Your partner, then, is free to try anything — oral, penetrative, intercrural or other kinds of sex, or simply full-body kisses mixed with soft biting or licking paired with the ability to run their hands all over you. They’ll love the freedom of being in charge, and you’ll enjoy the thrill of being totally submissive to them. Of course, if you want to be the dominant partner, feel free to flip this. BDSM works best when both of you are as comfortable as possible, and be sure to check in with your partner periodically throughout as well and afterwards.
Another fun option? Bring in toys. Whether you’re trying out some extra sexy lingerie, using a strap-on, or eating candy-panties off each other, the use of additional toys can add some adventure to your sex life. Some popular items you should consider using: A sex swing, which allows for new positioning with added support. Sex dice allow you to roll two dice with sexy words on them to get an all-new experimental position. Toys like strap-ons allow you to try different kinds of penetration. Remember, though, it is important to talk with your partner before purchasing and trying any sex toys to ensure both parties are willing and comfortable. Be sure, though, to clean any toys before and after sex with hot water and dish soap, or toy-cleaning spray, which can be found at any erotic goods store.
These next few almost count as gymnastics. If you’re tired of the same old same old, add in some yoga-esque poses. Try doing a backbend while your partner kneels in front of you and goes down on you, or get yourself in the downward dog position while your partner kneels behind you. An extra fun new way to try oral? Sixty-nining while one partner stands upright and the other is held with legs wrapped behind your partner’s neck (feel free to use the wall or the bed to support you in this if necessary). Another option is reverse cowgirl, but with your partner sitting upright rather than laying down. If they’re into experimenting, try rubbing or even licking their feet and toes to get a little foot fetish action in there. You never know until you try, right? If you’re really flexible, and your partner is, too, these can make sexy time extra exhilarating.
No matter what you try this Valentine’s Day, remember that consent is always sexy, and comfort and safety are the most important factors when it comes to physical intimacy.