Stay Gold Pineapple Boy, Stay Gold

What can end a relationship, divide a household, or turn lifelong friends to enemies? Pineapples on pizza. This prickly tropical fruit can bring out more of a reaction from people than a Beatles concert in the 60s. How is this possible? I don’t get it. Who doesn’t love a juicy, sun-ripened, slice of yellow pineapple on a hot summer day? How can someone not enjoy a hunk of mozzarella on a slice of doughy pizza with a little bit of sweetness? Pineapple on pizza is amazing.

Lovers of this delicacy shouldn’t be surprised to know that the first humans to put this fruit on pizza are the nicest on earth: Canadians. They gave the world the gift of the Hawaiian pizza in 1954, and pizza hasn’t been the same since.

When eating pizza that is blessed with ripe pieces of pineapple, one is transported to a tropical island. The Italian dish is reconstructed into a fresh masterpiece. It is a combination of cultures and history in a single bite. The circular nosh brings delight to any onlooker with soft nodes of red, white, and green highlighted next to the contrasting yellow. Pineapple on pizza makes the dish more beautiful.

If for no other reason, it is factual that pineapple creates a more nutritious pizza. Adding pineapple opens the door to a meal with all food groups: diners receive a full serving of grains, protein, vegetables and fruit. Parents can rejoice in the fact that serving this meal to children will bring them joy and health.

Those who can’t seem to enjoy this pleasure in life are missing out. Lucky for you, leaving your leftover slices of heaven in the fridge has a slim chance of being stolen by your pineapple loathing roommates. Stay gold pineapple boy, stay gold.