Globetrotters disaster, plz bring @skierboi799 home

Disaster struck on Saturday, March 23 at the Brick Breeden Fieldhouse as the world famous Harlem Globetrotters came to town to play the Montana high school all-star teams from the 2023-24 season. 

“I’m not even sure how to describe what happened,” UFC fighter Suga Sean O’Malley said. “The top five NBA players of all time could’ve played the high schoolers and still not won.”

As the game got underway the highschoolers jumped out to a quick 17-3 lead with 12 points coming from Lebron James III. As the Globetrotters started the game too casually, they found themselves down big as the first quarter winded down. The high school players found themselves up 35-7 at the end of the first. 

“It was a horrible start for our team,” coach Al Clocker said. “I tried to inspire the squad to get the comeback going, but it didn’t quite work.”

The Globetrotters were riding a 76-game win streak and this was their first game against high school competition in just over three years. A game that looked like a lock for another mark in the win column turned into a disaster just after tip-off on Saturday night.

The Brick was packed with a crowd of people expecting a show like the Globetrotters normally put on, but the show was cut short as 5’2” point guard Richard Smalls was lighting it up from deep.

“Bang!” PA announcer Jim Carrey said, und

Our reporter was a guest of Crawdad Wodaddy and Chump the Bobcat’s recent nuptials and unfortunately did not return to tell the tale. The Excrement team is hard at work searching for him, but for now, these are his last words. Please respect our privacy at this difficult time.