Satire: Core Classes are the Pride and Joy of my Schedule

Core classes are without a doubt the most useful courses of any college student with a specific direction and major in mind. Any engineering major is dying to take an Intro to Shakespeare class. Money won’t spend itself, so why not use thousands of it on a mandatory class that has nothing to do with the specific degree you chose to pursue a specific career after college?

If you're pursuing a four year degree in History, you must embrace taking hours of your life away from reading up on WWII or Henry VIII to stay up into the wee hours of the morning to study for your Algebra 1 test. I’m sure that mathematical knowledge you barely absorb will prove itself incredibly useful when you’re teaching middle schoolers U.S. History.

Universities are definitely not well oiled machines set to take their student’s money. Why help a student who is using scholarships as their main source of college funds when you can demand they take a year's worth of expensive credits that do not pertain to their chosen major in the slightest?

Colleges know it’s important for their students to be well rounded products of education. They want young adults to get a sample of what possible career options there are, regardless of the fact that the 13 years spent in grade school was for just that. Little Jimmy, who dreamt of becoming an astronaut since he was 5 years old, will be especially grateful to have to spend thousands of dollars on a mandatory bowling class. 

If you are already planning on dedicating your young life to studying to be a surgeon, why not throw in a chance at lowering your GPA by taking classes that you don’t have time for, and are not interested in? This is the surest way to utilize your time and money wisely.

When a student can only afford to eat 99 cent pasta for dinner, the most beneficial thing for them is spending roughly $20,000, in addition to taking time away from working, resting, or spending time with friends. Who needs money or a social life when you have a headache and two hours of sleep? 

So if you’re a student who is in the middle of your core classes, don't be discouraged. Enjoy the hodgepodge of emotionally and financially taxing courses you may or may not utilize at the end of your four plus year degree.